Emma BennetYou’ve had it, haven’t you? That gut-churning feeling that somehow you’ve ended up in a position and you’re simply holding your breath, waiting for that moment when everyone discovers you’re not up to scratch? This feeling of discomfort isn’t exclusive to you or me; it’s shared by many professionals, leaders, and even the highly successful. They just don’t talk about it, and that’s the problem. It’s called Imposter Syndrome, a relentless schoolyard bully whispering doubts and insecurities into your ear, making you question your abilities and accomplishments.
Imposter Syndrome has no respect for success; it pops up precisely when you’re reaching new heights. I’ve felt it myself, and it’s more common than you think. Renowned psychologist, Dr. Valerie Young, an expert on the subject, categorised imposter feelings into five types – the perfectionist, the superwoman/man, the natural genius, the soloist, and the expert. Understanding these can help you realise that you’re not alone in this struggle.
One experience I’ll never forget is when I was invited to interview for a role that I didn’t think I was ready for. I approached the interview with a curious mind, trying to learn and connect rather than trying to sell myself. To my surprise, I landed the job. The fear of not meeting the role’s expectations almost made me turn it down. I was terrified of letting everyone down and being exposed as a fraud, and this imposter phenomenon was to blame.
Every successful venture was attributed to luck or the combined efforts of my brilliant team. When things didn’t go according to plan, my mind was quick to berate myself, reinforcing feelings of inadequacy and fear. This endless cycle of self-doubt and fear was not just tiring but also harmful to my mental well-being.
Harvard Business School Professor Amy Cuddy shares in her book ‘Presence’ that people privately agonise over this, and it keeps them up at night. She points out that it’s the belief that you’re an imposter, rather than the fact, which is so damaging.
So, how do we break free from this cycle? How do we reframe our mindset to use these feelings as a springboard for growth instead of a quicksand of self-doubt? I’d like to share with you some strategies that have worked for me and have been echoed by many successful coaches and leaders.
- Recognise and Acknowledge Your Achievements: Make it a habit to reflect on your accomplishments, however small they might seem. Keep a tangible record of your success stories and positive feedback. Use these as a counterbalance to your self-doubt.
- Reframe Failure as a Learning Opportunity: Embrace the learning journey with its highs and lows. Like renowned life coach Tony Robbins says, “There is no such thing as failure. There are only results.” Try to view setbacks as stepping stones to your success.
- Seek Support and Share Your Feelings: Lean on your trusted circle. Share your fears and doubts. Dr. Valerie Young advises that simply talking about imposter feelings can help. In her words, “The only way to stop feeling like an imposter is to stop thinking like an imposter.”
- Practice Self-Compassion: Being kind to yourself can make a huge difference. Remember that everyone faces challenges and experiences self-doubt. You’re deserving of success and happiness, just as much as anyone else.
- Celebrate Your Progress: Embrace every small win on your journey. Remember, success isn’t a destination but a journey, and every step forward deserves recognition.
Let’s circle back to my experience. Over time, I’ve realised that the feeling of inadequacy was a signal that I was pushing beyond my comfort zone. It meant I was growing, exploring uncharted territories. During my coaching journey, a particular phrase stuck with me: ‘If you’re not squirming, you’re not learning.’ It serves as a potent reminder that moments of self-doubt can be transformative, leading to personal and professional growth.
And so, my friends, remember this: Imposter syndrome doesn’t mark a lack of skill or talent, but rather, it’s an emblem of your journey towards personal growth and self-improvement. The pathway to self-confidence and belief is well within your grasp. You are worthy of all your successes, and armed with a resilient mindset, you’re more than capable of achieving spectacular things.
So, let’s celebrate our humanity and give ourselves permission to be vulnerable. Let’s acknowledge and honour our achievements, have faith in our capabilities, and continue to learn and evolve. Imposter syndrome isn’t a life sentence; it’s merely a sign that we’re pushing beyond our comfort zones, that we’re truly living, and that we’re continually developing.
As we jointly tackle the challenges of imposter syndrome, let’s not forget we’re part of a wider community. We’re not alone on this journey. With mutual understanding and resilience, we can not only conquer imposter syndrome but use it as a catalyst for growth and self-assurance. Remember, each of our journeys is unique and individually defined, and it’s more than okay to seek help along the way – because we’re all in this together.
Imposter Syndrome doesn’t get to dictate who we are. We hold the power to overcome it and allow our true potential to dazzle. By celebrating each of our accomplishments and continually striving for growth, we can carve a path to self-belief and confidence. Remember, the journey to success is not a distant dream but a tangible reality within your reach, and with a resilient mindset, extraordinary achievements are but a step away…
Emma Bennett
Business Improvement Consultant and Coach
